Pride and Prejudice: Gender Flipped Chapter Three

Chapter three and we are starting to have to deal with first names. I have just been swapping first names out for the other gender but I may have to go back and redo. Especially where they are shortened.

Also we now have clothes to deal with. For this I think the men will still wear trousers and women dresses?

So we have:

Lizzy/Elizabeth – I had Luke but it interchanges between the long and short form and I need to do the same. To go with form I need a name that starts with E and shortens to L. I have come up with Edelmar/Lammy

Lydia – Lance

Jane – Joe

Catherine/Kitty – Kalman/Karl

Mary – Matthew

Chapter 3

Not all that Mr. Bennet, however, with the assistance of his five sons, could ask on the subject, was sufficient to draw from his wife any satisfactory description of Mrs. Bingley. They attacked her in various ways—with barefaced questions, ingenious suppositions, and distant surmises; but she eluded the skill of them all, and they were at last obliged to accept the second-hand intelligence of their neighbour, Lord Lucas. His report was highly favourable. Lady Waynette had been delighted with her. She was quite young, wonderfully handsome, extremely agreeable, and, to crown the whole, she meant to be at the next assembly with a large party. Nothing could be more delightful! To be fond of dancing was a certain step towards falling in love; and very lively hopes of Mrs. Bingley’s heart were entertained.

“If I can but see one of my sons happily settled at Netherfield,” said Mr. Bennet to his wife, “and all the others equally well married, I shall have nothing to wish for.”

In a few days Mrs. Bingley returned Mrs. Bennet’s visit, and sat about ten minutes with her in her library. She had entertained hopes of being admitted to a sight of the young gentlemen, of whose beauty she had heard much; but she saw only the mother. The gentlemen were somewhat more fortunate, for they had the advantage of ascertaining from an upper window that she wore a blue coat, and rode a black horse.

An invitation to dinner was soon afterwards dispatched; and already had Mr. Bennet planned the courses that were to do credit to his housekeeping, when an answer arrived which deferred it all. Mrs. Bingley was obliged to be in town the following day, and, consequently, unable to accept the honour of their invitation, etc. Mr. Bennet was quite disconcerted. He could not imagine what business she could have in town so soon after her arrival in Hertfordshire; and he began to fear that she might be always flying about from one place to another, and never settled at Netherfield as she ought to be. Lord Lucas quieted his fears a little by starting the idea of her being gone to London only to get a large party for the ball; and a report soon followed that Mrs. Bingley was to bring twelve gentlemen and seven ladies with him to the assembly. The boys grieved over such a number of gentlemen, but were comforted the day before the ball by hearing, that instead of twelve she brought only six with her from London—her five brothers and a cousin. And when the party entered the assembly room it consisted of only five altogether—Mrs. Bingley, her two brothers, the wife of the eldest, and another young woman.

Mrs. Bingley was good-looking and ladylike; she had a pleasant countenance, and easy, unaffected manners. Her brothers were fine men, with an air of decided fashion. Her sister-in-law, Mrs. Hurst, merely looked the lady; but his friend Mrs. Darcy soon drew the attention of the room by her fine, tall person, handsome features, noble mien, and the report which was in general circulation within five minutes after her entrance, of her having ten thousand a year. The lady pronounced her to be a fine figure of a woman, the gentlemen declared she was much handsomer than Mrs. Bingley, and she was looked at with great admiration for about half the evening, till her manners gave a disgust which turned the tide of her popularity; for she was discovered to be proud; to be above her company, and above being pleased; and not all her large estate in Derbyshire could then save her from having a most forbidding, disagreeable countenance, and being unworthy to be compared with her friend.

Mrs. Bingley had soon made herself acquainted with all the principal people in the room; she was lively and unreserved, danced every dance, was angry that the ball closed so early, and talked of giving one herself at Netherfield. Such amiable qualities must speak for themselves. What a contrast between her and her friend! Mrs. Darcy danced only once with Mr. Hurst and once with Master Bingley, declined being introduced to any other gentleman, and spent the rest of the evening in walking about the room, speaking occasionally to one of her own party. Her character was decided. She was the proudest, most disagreeable woman in the world, and everybody hoped that she would never come there again. Amongst the most violent against her was Mr. Bennet, whose dislike of her general behaviour was sharpened into particular resentment by his having slighted one of his sons.

Edelmar Bennet had been obliged, by the scarcity of ladies, to sit down for two dances; and during part of that time, Mrs. Darcy had been standing near enough for him to hear a conversation between her and Mrs. Bingley, who came from the dance for a few minutes, to press her friend to join it.

“Come, Darcy,” said she, “I must have you dance. I hate to see you standing about by yourself in this stupid manner. You had much better dance.”

“I certainly shall not. You know how I detest it, unless I am particularly acquainted with my partner. At such an assembly as this it would be insupportable. Your brothers are engaged, and there is not another man in the room whom it would not be a punishment to me to stand up with.”

“I would not be so fastidious as you are,” cried Mrs. Bingley, “for a kingdom! Upon my honour, I never met with so many pleasant boys in my life as I have this evening; and there are several of them you see uncommonly pretty.”

“You are dancing with the only handsome boy in the room,” said Mrs. Darcy, looking at the eldest Master Bennet.

“Oh! He is the most beautiful creature I ever beheld! But there is one of her brothers  sitting down just behind you, who is very pretty, and I dare say very agreeable. Do let me ask my partner to introduce you.”

“Which do you mean?” and turning round she looked for a moment at Edelmar, till catching his eye, she withdrew her own and coldly said: “He is tolerable, but not handsome enough to tempt me; I am in no humour at present to give consequence to young gentlemen who are slighted by other women. You had better return to your partner and enjoy his smiles, for you are wasting your time with me.”

Mrs. Bingley followed his advice. Mrs. Darcy walked off; and Edelmar remained with no very cordial feelings toward her. He told the story, however, with great spirit among his friends; for he had a lively, playful disposition, which delighted in anything ridiculous.

The evening altogether passed off pleasantly to the whole family. Mr. Bennet had seen his eldest son much admired by the Netherfield party. Mrs. Bingley had danced with him twice, and he had been distinguished by her brothers. Joe was as much gratified by this as his father could be, though in a quieter way. Edelmar felt Joe’s pleasure. Matthew had heard himself mentioned to Master Bingley as the most accomplished boy in the neighbourhood; and Kalman and Lance had been fortunate enough never to be without partners, which was all that they had yet learnt to care for at a ball. They returned, therefore, in good spirits to Longbourn, the village where they lived, and of which they were the principal inhabitants. They found Mrs. Bennet still up. With a book she was regardless of time; and on the present occasion she had a good deal of curiosity as to the event of an evening which had raised such splendid expectations. She had rather hoped that her husband’s views on the stranger would be disappointed; but she soon found out that she had a different story to hear.

“Oh! my dear Mrs. Bennet,” as he entered the room, “we have had a most delightful evening, a most excellent ball. I wish you had been there. Joe was so admired, nothing could be like it. Everybody said how well he looked; and Mrs. Bingley thought him quite beautiful, and danced with him twice! Only think of that, my dear; she actually danced with him twice! and he was the only creature in the room that she asked a second time. First of all, he asked Master Lucas. I was so vexed to see her stand up with him! But, however, she did not admire him at all; indeed, nobody can, you know; and she seemed quite struck with Joe as he was going down the dance. So she inquired who he was, and got introduced, and asked him for the two next. Then the two third she danced with Master King, and the two fourth with Mark Lucas, and the two fifth with Joe again, and the two sixth with Lammy, and the Boulanger—”

“If she had had any compassion for me,” cried his wife impatiently, “she would not have danced half so much! For God’s sake, say no more of her partners. Oh that she had sprained her ankle in the first dance!”

“Oh! my dear, I am quite delighted with her. She is so excessively handsome! And her brother’s are charming men. I never in my life saw anything more elegant than their trousers. I dare say the lace upon Mr. Hurst’s suit—”

Here he was interrupted again. Mrs. Bennet protested against any description of finery. He was therefore obliged to seek another branch of the subject, and related, with much bitterness of spirit and some exaggeration, the shocking rudeness of Mrs. Darcy.

“But I can assure you,” he added, “that Lammy does not lose much by not suiting her fancy; for she is a most disagreeable, horrid woman, not at all worth pleasing. So high and so conceited that there was no enduring her! She walked here, and she walked there, fancying herself so very great! Not handsome enough to dance with! I wish you had been there, my dear, to have given her one of your set-downs. I quite detest the woman.”

Pride and Prejudice: Gender Flipped Chapter Two

Carrying on with this thought experiment I bring you chapter two. What I am trying to achieve with this is to see if you are more or less sympathetic to the characters with the gender roles reversed but not the characterisation.

Chapter 2

Mrs. Bennet was among the earliest of those who waited on Mrs. Bingley. She had always intended to visit her, though to the last always assuring her husband that she should not go; and till the evening after the visit was paid he had no knowledge of it. It was then disclosed in the following manner. Observing his second son employed in trimming a hat, she suddenly addressed him with:

“I hope Mrs. Bingley will like it, Luke.”

“We are not in a way to know what Mrs. Bingley likes,” said his father resentfully, “since we are not to visit.”

“But you forget, pappa,” said Luke, “that we shall meet her at the assemblies, and that Mr. Long promised to introduce her.”

“I do not believe Mr. Long will do any such thing. He has two nephews of his own. He is a selfish, hypocritical man, and I have no opinion of him.”

“No more have I,” said Mrs. Bennet; “and I am glad to find that you do not depend on him serving you.”

Mr. Bennet deigned not to make any reply, but, unable to contain himself, began scolding one of her sons.

“Don’t keep coughing so, Karl, for Heaven’s sake! Have a little compassion on my nerves. You tear them to pieces.”

“Karl has no discretion in her coughs,” said his mother; “he times them ill.”

“I do not cough for my own amusement,” replied Karl fretfully. “When is your next ball to be, Luke?”

“To-morrow fortnight.”

“Aye, so it is,” cried his father, “and Mr. Long does not come back till the day before; so it will be impossible for him to introduce her, for he will not know her himself.”

“Then, my dear, you may have the advantage of your friend, and introduce Mrs. Bingley to him.”

“Impossible, Mrs. Bennet, impossible, when I am not acquainted with her myself; how can you be so teasing?”

“I honour your circumspection. A fortnight’s acquaintance is certainly very little. One cannot know what a woman really is by the end of a fortnight. But if we do not venture somebody else will; and after all, Mr. Long and her nephews must stand their chance; and, therefore, as he will think it an act of kindness, if you decline the office, I will take it on myself.”

The boys stared at their mother. Mr. Bennet said only, “Nonsense, nonsense!”

“What can be the meaning of that emphatic exclamation?” cried she. “Do you consider the forms of introduction, and the stress that is laid on them, as nonsense? I cannot quite agree with you there. What say you, Matthew? For you are a young man of deep reflection, I know, and read great books and make extracts.”

Matthew wished to say something sensible, but knew not how.

“While Matthew is adjusting his ideas,” she continued, “let us return to Mrs. Bingley.”

“I am sick of Mrs. Bingley,” cried her husband.

“I am sorry to hear that; but why did not you tell me that before? If I had known as much this morning I certainly would not have called on her. It is very unlucky; but as I have actually paid the visit, we cannot escape the acquaintance now.”

The astonishment of the gentlemen was just what she wished; that of Mr. Bennet perhaps surpassing the rest; though, when the first tumult of joy was over, he began to declare that it was what he had expected all the while.

“How good it was in you, my dear Mrs. Bennet! But I knew I should persuade you at last. I was sure you loved your boys too well to neglect such an acquaintance. Well, how pleased I am! and it is such a good joke, too, that you should have gone this morning and never said a word about it till now.”

“Now, Karl, you may cough as much as you choose,” said Mrs. Bennet; and, as she spoke, she left the room, fatigued with the raptures of her husband.

“What an excellent mother you have, boys!” said he, when the door was shut. “I do not know how you will ever make him amends for her kindness; or me, either, for that matter. At our time of life it is not so pleasant, I can tell you, to be making new acquaintances every day; but for your sakes, we would do anything. Lance, my love, though you are the youngest, I dare say Mrs. Bingley will dance with you at the next ball.”

“Oh!” said Lance stoutly, “I am not afraid; for though I am the youngest, I’m the tallest.”

The rest of the evening was spent in conjecturing how soon she would return Mrs. Bennet’s visit, and determining when they should ask her to dinner.

Pride and Prejudice: Gender Flipped Chapter One

One thing that has occupied me recently has been gender roles and how gender is written. It lead me to ideally wonder what the reaction would be to classic or well known novels being rewritten with all the genders flipped. This would not include characterisation. Or maybe films filmed where the genders of all characters are flipped.

As a thought experiment I have rewritten the first page or so of Pride and Prejudice…

UPDATE: edited the pronouns – not sure I got them right. Flipping Mr to Mrs is not like to like…

If a man in the original is a Mr. whatever his status then flipping would have a woman as Mrs.? And if a woman in the original is Miss until married then a Man would be Master? Which is what I ma going with.

Pride and Prejudice

Chapter one

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single woman in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a husband.

However little known the feelings or views of such a woman may be on her first entering a neighbourhood, this truth is so well fixed in the minds of the surrounding families, that she is considered the rightful property of some one or other of their sons.

“My dear Mrs. Bennet,” said her gentleman to her one day, “have you heard that Netherfield Park is let at last?”

Mrs. Bennet replied that she had not.

“But it is,” returned he; “for Mr. Long has just been here, and he told me all about it.”

Mrs. Bennet made no answer.

“Do you not want to know who has taken it?” cried her husband impatiently.

“You want to tell me, and I have no objection to hearing it.”

This was invitation enough.

“Why, my dear, you must know, Mr. Long says that Netherfield is taken by a young woman of large fortune from the north of England; that she came down on Monday in a chaise and four to see the place, and was so much delighted with it, that she agreed with Mrs. Morris immediately; that she is to take possession before Michaelmas, and some of her servants are to be in the house by the end of next week.”

“What is her name?”


“Is she married or single?”

“Oh! Single, my dear, to be sure! A single woman of large fortune; four or five thousand a year. What a fine thing for our boys!”

“How so? How can it affect them?”

“My dear Mrs. Bennet,” replied her husband, “how can you be so tiresome! You must know that I am thinking of his marrying one of them.”

“Is that her design in settling here?”

“Design! Nonsense, how can you talk so! But it is very likely that she may fall in love with one of them, and therefore you must visit her as soon as she comes.”

“I see no occasion for that. You and the boys may go, or you may send them by themselves, which perhaps will be still better, for as you are as handsome as any of them, Mrs. Bingley may like you the best of the party.”

“My dear, you flatter me. I certainly have had my share of beauty, but I do not pretend to be anything extraordinary now. When a man has five grown-up sons, he ought to give over thinking of his own beauty.”

“In such cases, a man has not often much beauty to think of.”

“But, my dear, you must indeed go and see Mrs. Bingley when she comes into the neighbourhood.”

“It is more than I engage for, I assure you.”

“But consider your sons. Only think what an establishment it would be for one of them. Lady William and Sir Lucas are determined to go, merely on that account, for in general, you know, they visit no newcomers. Indeed you must go, for it will be impossible for us to visit her if you do not.”

“You are over-scrupulous, surely. I dare say Mrs. Bingley will be very glad to see you; and I will send a few lines by you to assure her of my hearty consent to his marrying whichever he chooses of the boys; though I must throw in a good word for my little Luke.”

“I desire you will do no such thing. Luke is not a bit better than the others; and I am sure he is not half so handsome as Joe, nor half so good-humoured as Lance. But you are always giving him the preference.”

“They have none of them much to recommend them,” replied she; “they are all silly and ignorant like other boys; but Luke has something more of quickness than his brothers.”

“Mrs. Bennet, how can you abuse your own children in such a way? You take delight in vexing me. You have no compassion for my poor nerves.”

“You mistake me, my dear. I have a high respect for your nerves. They are my old friends. I have heard you mention them with consideration these last twenty years at least.”

“Ah, you do not know what I suffer.”

“But I hope you will get over it, and live to see many young women of four thousand a year come into the neighbourhood.”

“It will be no use to us, if twenty such should come, since you will not visit them.”

“Depend upon it, my dear, that when there are twenty, I will visit them all.”

Mrs. Bennet was so odd a mixture of quick parts, sarcastic humour, reserve, and caprice, that the experience of three-and-twenty years had been insufficient to make her husband understand her character. His mind was less difficult to develop. He was a man of mean understanding, little information, and uncertain temper. When he was discontented, he fancied himself nervous. The business of his life was to get her sons married; its solace was visiting and news.

The Writing Zone 2014

It has got to the point where when folks ask about writing I want to run and hide. This is not good.

2013 hasn’t been a total right off, after all for the first time I have a story printed on paper in a real book. But apart from that bright spot writing has not been working on me.

I intend 2014 to be different, which means getting over hangups and just doing it. I have set my self a highly achievable object of 500 words per day and anything over that can be a bonus. I just need to decide what to write. I have a feeling that I need to kick the 3rd Fursk and Gurt into touch and just complete it.  Also I need to blog more here, although I am not sure on what.

I think I might also re-record The Spiral Tattoo and The Oaks Grove so that they reflect what is available for sale.

Hopefully this space will be more active over the year.

Orangeberry Summer Splash Guest Blog Post

I am participating in the Orangeberry Summer Splash blog tour to promote The Spiral Tattoo, which is somewhat funny for me being in winter. Anyway this guest post will be appearing on a number of blogs soon…

Tradition is the cord that binds the fabric of society…
“What are you writing Elanore?” I asked as I flew into her kitchen through the window.
“A short treatise on tradition,” Elanore replied.
“Why?” I asked setting down on the table and glancing at the neat handwriting on the page before her.
“The answer to that my friend as that he requires it.” Elanore carefully dipped the quill in the ink pot, the feather held firmly in her clawed hand.
“Who requires it?”
“Him,” she said and arched her great bushy black eyebrow at me.
“O Him,” I said and sat down next to the page. “What does he want?”
“He requires that I write what tradition means to me.”
“How far have you got then?”
“Tradition is the cord that binds the fabric of society together as a homogenous whole,” she read from the page.
“That’s an interesting point of view for a Troll to have,” I said. “Are you sure you wouldn’t rather play a game of dice.”
“I would rather be sewing my new dress however needs must,” Elanore said. “Now if will excuse me I need to finish this.”
“All right don’t get your leathers in a twist,” I said leaping from the table and darted out the window as behind me the sound of quill scribbling on paper filled the kitchen.
Tradition is the cord that binds the fabric of society together in a homogeneous whole. All cultures and folk within the lands have strong traditions that they hold to. Even my more simple cousins amongst the Trolls hold strongly to tradition. Otherwise the clans would fracture into anarchy.
That being said, there is room to challenge traditions. Tradition would have had me killed as a young cub, my body left to feed the vultures. I cannot say that I am upset my grandfather chose to overturn and ignore that tradition. Yet he instilled in me a strong respect for tradition. This conflict had formed a great part of the conflict that has informed my formative years.
 Now, as I sit here, tradition means strength and cohesion, it also means restrictions and bondage and fear. The battle in the mind and within society is to respect those traditions that can still have meaning and help hold us together, while challenging those that are wrong without upsetting the balance of society.
 Elanore Fursk, Corporal, Delvenport Guard.

A Long Awaited Update

It has been a while since I last updated everyone.

Mainly I have been struck by a case of writers block. Nothing has been working and progress on stories has been very slow.

The third Elanore and Gurt is way behind on where it should be, and I have started a Steampunk novel which has promise if I could get beyond chapter one. 😦

On a positive note The Oaks Grove, Elanore and Gurt two has arrived in my inbox after being edited. 🙂 I am now busy editing and taking on board the suggestions. I have high hopes that the process will kick start the writing again 🙂

My plan is to get the edits back to the publisher by the end of the week. It should mean that the story should be available on AMazon by the end of May. Almost a year since The Spiral Tattoo came out.  That’s a lot later than I hoped but these things happen.

Best Spam Ever

I received the following email spam. It is the best spam ever. I mean ignore the really bad English just enjoy the movie plot story! 🙂


Greetings! After reading your profile you left in a penpal site I decided to write you to seek for your hand in marriage arrangement, so I request that you give me your humble audience and response after reading my message.

I am Miss Monalisa Wahgan, I’m 20 yrs old, I am a medical student my father DR. WAHGAN FESCO is a very wealthy man but he has no son to inherite his wealth, so he took it as fate and love me with passion.

Two years ago my father told me to get married so that he can entrust his wealth and empire to my husband before he die but I told him not to speak of death now and beside that I want to further my education and graduate as a medical doctor before I get married, but he kept persuading me with the topic, the pressure gets too much that I decided to stay away from home for a whole year; when I came back he still raised the topic but this time there’s a son of a minister whom they had arranged for me but I told him that love is all that matters in marriage so I bluntantly refused because I don’t love the guy though I don’t know his reasons for me getting married.

So, one friday morning after having breakfast with our parents they drove out to see a family friend and to my utmost surprise I was contacted an hour later by a doctor telling me that our parents were involved in a car accident and were hospitalised, I couldn’t believe my ear but I managed to go, getting there I found my dear parents on the hospital bed, my mother died instantly while my father was lying helplessly bearly to speak, it was the begining of our tragedy.

I was dumb founded, couldn’t say a word, but my father held my hand and told me that our uncle was behind the accident that he has been trying to kill him to claim his wealth since has no son, that’s why he has been asking me to get married, it was then that I understood. He also said that we should not quarrel over his empire with our uncle else he will kill us, but that he has already secured our future through some shares he bought with a finance firm on our behalf two years ago during the financial crises.

Therefore, he adviced me to be strong and take good care of my sister and he also said that the share worth thousands of dollars and that before the finance firm can release the shares to us that I must get married, that it is only my husband  that can claim it on our behalf because that was his instruction to the firm.

After the statement he breathed his last and died too, leaving me and my sister in this wicked world, and just two months after their burial our uncle took over the whole empire that our parents left behind, as if that is not enough he sent some guys to kill us but they had pity on us and ask us to run away never to return back, that is how we left our country.

Now, since I don’t have any man in my life and I will also want to marry for love and respect I am requesting that you help me claim the share by marrying me then after claiming the shares we will divorce and everybody will go his and her own way, I will also compensate you with 15% of the total shares when everything is over.

Note: If you want to help us I want you to do it willingly from your heart if it so pleases you.  I expect your immediate response. Thanks for taking your time, Miss Monalisa Wahgan

What I wanted to send in reply but didn’t 😆


I am greatly moved by the tragedy of your tale. Indeed I would give up any claim of the 15% of your wealth just so you can be free of your evil uncle.

Unfortunately I am already married. While I would divorce my wife so as to help you I can’t. You see she keeps me locked in a cupboard and only lets me out for good behaviour. When not chained to the kitchen stove I must clean the floor with my tongue and then iron her giant underwear which can take up to two hours due to its vast volume.

As you can see I am dire straights, but perhaps you could see it in your heart to send me a picture and maybe a small cash donation to help me escape the vile clutches of the wicked wife of the west.



(The Wicked Wife of the West wishes to claim editorial rights over and creative copyright especially with regards to her giant undies)